Ep 68 AITA Hotdog Edition! Just kidding (but not really) it’s the 4th of July!

What is the good old US of A at its core? Well, we decided to take that magical school bus trip to the center of America and what did we find? Not molten lava, The Statue of Liberty, or even bald eagles like you might suspect. We found hotdogs. And boy, were there many. 

Today we’re resuming our “Am I the A Hole?!” Holiday Series with our 4th of July episode. We’ve got angry neighbors, firework probs, lake vacations gone awry… but most importantly… food dilemmas. And a surprising amount about hot dogs. Which we think is shockingly appropriate. 

We tried to tie this in with the book theme… but alas, America’s Independence Day AITA probs seem to have few literary tie-ins (we’d be lying if we said we were surprised by this 🤷‍♀️). 

So buckle up for a spoiler free episode, guaranteed to make you laugh even during the worst of times. We’ve got millennial faves and fails from childhood summer vacays, and a multi layered smash or pass involving our favorite patriotic staples: A Texas Ranger, a deranged cook, and a good old man crop top.

"In this festive and silly Fourth of July episode of Besties in the Books, hosts Ashley and Liz deliver a hilarious, spoiler-free dive into Reddit’s "Am I the A-Hole?" threads—holiday edition. While embracing summer nostalgia, the duo reflects on millennial childhood faves and fails—from Doughboy pool whirlpools and Flintstones push-pops to slip-and-slide injuries and life before the internet. They also address the emotional weight of this year’s July 4th, reminding listeners that resistance, rest, and joy can coexist. Highlights include a ridiculous hot dog eating contest gone wrong and a neighborly fireworks debate, with the Besties blending sharp humor, cultural commentary, and a sense of community. Tune in for laughs, reflection, and summer vibes with your favorite bookish besties."

Don't be shy, subscribe! New Podcasts every Tuesday!! (And sometimes Friday!…)

Check out these author interviews? ⬇️

Penn Cole talks with us about Strong Female Characters, Feminist Themes, and her debut bestselling Spark of the Everflame Series! https://youtu.be/7ukNImyoObw?si=7C3Y9kOUMN4hfcKb

We interviewed Callie Hart all about her NYT Bestseller Quicksilver! Watch it here! https://youtu.be/CED5s7qDBdQ?si=8xtIRO1IzX6Rsld4

Check the official Author Interview with Lindsay Straube of Split or Swallow! Now a Barnes & Noble & Amazon best seller titled: Kiss of the Basilisk!  https://youtu.be/fknhocSNIKM

Need more ACOTAR in your life? Cook your way through Velaris with the help of Chelsea Cole and her cookbook A Feast of Thorns & Roses. Check out our author interview here! https://youtu.be/fjzmqd-x3OA?si=kNJ4D9cxvUjhp-Ik

____

YouTube | TikTok | I

The Write Note
Exploring the craft of writing and its impact on pop culture.

Listen on:   Spotify

YouTube | TikTok | Instagram | Podcast Platforms
@BestiesandtheBooksPodcast

Besties and the Book Club on Fable!
https://fable.co/bestiesandthebookclub-474863489358

Liz
Instagram | TikTok
@TheRealLifeVeganWife

Ashley
Instagram | TikTok
@AshleyEllix

Chapters

• 0:00 Welcome to Besties and the Books Podcast!
• 3:50 Favs and Fails Summer Nostalgia Childhood Edition
• 10:38 [Ad] The Write Note
• 11:26 (Cont.) Favs and Fails Summer Nostalgia Childhood Edition
• 13:42 AITA For Winning the Hot Dog Eating Contest?
• 24:13 AITA if I Still Use Fireworks Against My Neighbors Request?
• 27:20 AITA for Never Helping with My Siblings Kids at 4th of July?
• 34:47 AITA if I Don’t Let My Boyfriend Go On A Fourth of July Trip?
• 41:51 AITA for Accidentally Him Arrested for Fireworks?
• 46:32 AITA for Not Eating Pork on the 4th of July
• 49:17 AITA for Eating my Brother’s Hot Dog?
• 53:41 AITA for Putting Up Halloween in the Summer?
• 58:01 Unhinged Smash or Pass

Transcript

0:00

i'd eaten 16 hot dogs i blacked out and ate 16 hot dogs in 5 minutes whirlpooling and people's dough boys are men okay like literally am I the a-hole[Music] hey you guys I'm Ashley and I'm Liz and this is the Besties in the Books podcast welcome welcome welcome spoilerfree episode we haven't done one of these in a while i'm so excited so today we're going to be doing one of our responding to Am I the a-hole threads on Reddit Fourth of July themed like the holiday episodes we like the holiday episodes it always seems like there's good like family friend drama for the holidays um and then that way you know over on Instagram we can post uh polls and stories that you guys can then vote are they the a-hole or not and we love doing that with you guys too so make sure to go follow us over there um before we get started on this super fun episode for Fourth of July Am I the a-hole we wanted to address uh the gigantic elephant in the room yeah um which is you know this July 4th it might be a little bit hard for us to feel like there's much to celebrate a little maybe a little bit harder than the typical Fourth of July um so this is our reminder to you that at the end of the day you know all things said and done over 5 million people actually were press pro protesting on No King's Day um so millions of others were resisting in other ways um you know numerous other ways depending on what you were able to do um so we just wanted to focus on that and how at the end of the day if you are struggling mentally right now with everything that is going on we completely understand that um but just know that you know there are millions and millions and millions of people out there who share the same hope and beliefs that we can do better and we just wanted to give you a little bit of that mental escape a little bit of time to laugh um that's our job here is to make you guys laugh and have a good time if we can do it even for you know an hour a week or whatever it is for you um but we really just wanted to address that issue and just remind you that we're all resisting in our own way and you're not alone yes definitely um but before we get into these people's problems yeah we just wanted to say thank you so much for being here yeah seriously thank you guys so much for being here taking time out of your day and your book and maybe your busy crazy hectic summer schedule thank you for joining us today and just seeing you know how we would respond to these am I the a-hole threads and we can't wait to hear what you guys say about these too cuz sometimes we're wrong you know and that's okay so make sure to like follow and subscribe anywhere you like to listen to your favorite podcast including YouTube we are trying to hit our thousand minimum over there by fall that's our little goal over here so it means a lot to us whenever you guys hit those subscribe buttons we appreciate it and then also follow us over on Tik Tok and Instagram we're at Besties in the Books podcast everywhere we do sprinkle these little Am I the a-hole you know episodes in especially during the holidays cuz they're so fun but we are primarily a book podcast usually we do like a little book icebreaker that tends to be holiday themed cuz there's surprisingly a lot of them sorry there weren't any this time though so this is going to be all summer or Fourth of July themed i tried searching it every which way and I couldn't find anything bookreated so you know take a break from your homework take a break from your book and just hang out with us and just vibe so yep here we are yep but of course going to keep it Millennial nostalgia theme you know over here with our fave and veil it's going to be great summer childhood edition yes shall we just kick that off like right out of the gate why don't you start this time what's your fave and fail summer childhood edition of course I have like a ton of favorites but I know I'm down to just a few that I'll mention because we don't have all day and I could go on and on so hang on let me get my list no I'm just kidding oh my god um no briefly mention some of my favorite moments of childhood that don't happen anymore that I see mhm yeah whirlpooling and people's doughboys[Applause] first of all oh my god doughboy anymore right above ground pool is so fancy guys those are dough boys okay yeah like just because you built a deck around it doesn't make it not what it is you know what I mean that's a dough boy but like especially because the friends that I had that would have them they're a little bit of a smaller size so you could easily create like a vortex pool so I loved that we had a broken jacuzzi for a while and that's what we would do in the summer there you go and then ride the wave you know i don't see kids doing that anymore it's great uh yeah probably not um specifically the Flintstones is it push pops or push-ups the ice cream push-ups I think okay me and my husband were just talking about these dude jolly Llama here's the PSA go to your local co-op Whole Foods whatever jolly Llama ve They're vegan okay makes make some that are very similar in mango and in strawberry i want to say the mango ones are bomb and they are very similar in texture okay i'll be the judge of that cuz I feel like though without the Flintstones characters just doesn't feel the same i mean it's not the same but it's like as close as we can get yeah but like you would keep the little plastic little piece we'd use it for like I don't know an umbrella it's kind of the same type of thing that with the pizzas the little Barbie tables it's like a Barbie table yeah it's like this is a good piece of plastic man i don't know what I'm going to use with it but I'm going to do something with it or you get somebody else and you make a little wheel like roll yeah so those like you know being bored can be a good thing as a kid definitely trying to make my kids more bored lately um Okay and so this is a bit of a fave and a fail okay rolling into my fail section here this is a twofur tanning without knowing the extreme risks of skin cancer and premature aging oh what a time guys tanning baby oil tanning for me oh well yeah never for me yeah my fair lady i'm far too pale for that yeah yeah yeah my Well you attempted but work out no I used I'm an old school Jurgens self-tanning lotion girl cuz that's the gradual yeah it's been around since the dawn of time i used to buy it at Wraid so there you go yeah h but man something about that something about that so it's a fail because Hey oh whoops we're not supposed to do that okay but my actual fails I wrote down were hey you know slip and slides oh god yeah never really loved him never really loved like always would kind of It was one of those things when I was thinking about I was like you know I wouldn't be like "Oh I'm not doing that." But I just I wouldn't I wouldn't be the first and then people get bored and hurt real fast and you just don't do it that was definitely the I'm not doing that yeah it looks painful just smacking down well and it's rocks like rocks it's just your rocks and even if there's never enough cushion yeah exactly like there's a rock down in there somewhere and it's freaking jabbing you somewhere unpleasant that's what happens okay the other thing and that's just it is what it is um but just not having an AC in the summer golly you know sleep and you're just sweating so that was my childhood in the summer so while it was so good you were exhausted at night cuz you couldn't sleep it was so hot so hot so hot yeah i put uh faves of of childhood summers in the '9s right um bike until it literally just gets dark outside like basically just like going out into the neighborhood and just covering like I would say probably a good five square miles of area without any way for your parents to track you it was like just be home by dark and that was the beginning and the end of it so some of my favorite memories were like it was specifically like a very bike ridey like centered culture where you just meet up with your friends and just go everywhere and I love that so that was one of my favorites for sure um renting videos from in the current the gas the gas station yeah we didn't have no Blockbuster okay we had a place and I'm not making this up we had a place called The Damn Corner yep mhm it was a gas station that we had rent videos from every Friday see I didn't know they had videos there because we were on the other side and we had a video video palace at one point I think it was called mhm video plus were right next to each other yeah we weren't allowed to go to Video Plus cuz there was an adult section in the back so my parents wouldn't support it it was also like half of a washer and dryer like like an appliance store half an appliance store half a video store their selection sucked anyways the like couple times I had to go in there for my parents washer I'm like I don't want to go here anyways their selection Well I remember so Video Palace was the one that you would go to okay they had a fancy They had a great fantasy section guys i remember it was like a whole area that was like sectioned off and it was decorated all cool and that's where my um obsession with fairy tale theater movies started oh yes occasionally get to go out there but yeah I was in I was in Wford Heights so I was a little bit of a drive away from there so normally we would go to the gas station and rent our videos as you do you Yeah we did have a little tiny store in our area that we were cuz we were like way out in the mountains and he had probably like 25 dusty VHS's that every once in a while we would get yeah not not great ones though rip rip i know we have one video store left in Humble County that's still hanging on i think it's someone's I mean she has an incredible collection but I think it's like her Yeah personal Yeah but yeah I miss it i do I put oh I just put no internet really yeah yeah yeah no phones obligations no obligations just free just call your parents on the pay phone with a quarter yep were some of my favorites when I just kind of like briefly thought about it um my fail I put was so we have talked in the past about church camp okay so lots of good came out of going to church camp it was fun i like hanging out with my friends or whatever there was one summer where I came home with strep throat and pink eye that'll do it at the same time i just can't catch from summer camp yeah so be careful in those summer camp pools guys yeah that's fact yikes yikes mhm oh my god I love it yep your favorite millennial summer memories are or if we have any Gen Z or Gen X listeners out there we do in our demographic so we don't want to escalate you guys too y'all grew up with us alongside us just different age groups yeah what's your favorite just childhood of childhood years of yester years faves and fails we'll put a poll we'll put a box up on our Instagram besties in the Books podcast yeah mhm love it okay so should we just get into this am I the a-hole Fourth of July edition let's do it let's do it all right you want to go first you want me to go first today sure i'll go first this round okay so I had to do some Fourth of July adjacent stuff cuz you know I was getting creative and I thought this one was funny well I didn't read it all the way so we'll see but I like the title okay okay am I the a-hole for beating my girlfriend's dad in a hot dog eating contest[Music] okay okay well we'll see okay so the hot dog eating contest happened like six months ago during summer i had no idea that I did anything wrong but my girlfriend and I were arguing about something else and she brought the contest up imagine hold on imagine you're like having like a fight with your girlfriend she's like "Remember that hot dog eating contest?" Yeah like what man you've been holding on to that let's find out why okay all right brought up she brought up the contest and said that I acted childish and wanted to know if there was anything that I had to apologize for i ate one too many hot dogs no uh so basically 6 months ago my girlfriend invited me to a food festival in our hometown the day I arrived I learned that there was a hot dog eating contest and the prize would be a $100 gift card my gosh enough though for me but okay no no absolutely not to a large tech retail store being a casual competitive eater in college is this real a casual competitive eater just casually competitive eating okay this is a little off the rails here i decided it would be a fun idea to enter and sign up on the website yeah all sounds good yeah when I told my girlfriend's family I had entered the contest my girlfriend's dad goodnaturally clapped me on the back and said "Let the best man win." Oh the challenge has been accepted i smacked him with a glove i challenged you to So apparently my girlfriend's dad had won the hot dog eating contest for the last four years oh the plot thickens and was somewhat expecting to win again i mean why wouldn't any four time champ four time hot dog eating champ wanting the gift card I decided to give the contest mile i mean why wouldn't you because it's a it's a hot dog eating contest like it's not that it's a friendly competition it's not that deep okay i ate I ate a bunch of hot dogs as well i There's no way we can get through this i ate a bunch of hot dogs yeah okay good i'd be like I'd get a one and a half down be like I give up okay i I wasn't even paying attention to what I was doing blacked out but by But by the time I was done I'd eaten 16 hot dogs i blacked out and eat 16 hot dogs in five minutes dude wait does that include the bun too usually I watch a lot sometimes my husband It's so gross i have to I can't watch it sometimes my husband will put that on if we happen to be home for Fourth of July cuz there's a hot dog eating contest every year and this guy dominates it every time it is so disgusting like there's different techniques they shovel the hot dogs in first eat the bread later it's so gross but yeah anyways so this guy Okay he eats 16 in 5 minutes that's that's that's how many dogs a minute two to three three dogs blue ribbon for you three hot dogs a minute because three times five is 15 okay geez okay there's your math lesson of the day all right plus one bonus 16 hot dogs 5 minutes of beating my girlfriend's dad who had only eaten 12 hot dogs okay four let the best man win let the best man win when I was done my girlfriend's brother Liam who was 14 and a bunch of his friends mobbed me calling me the dogler okay giving me high fives and clapping me on the back you having a moment over there the doggler so they said I dethroned the dogler pointing to my girlfriend's dad and that I was the new dogler and that I was a real gizzard rler this is like some gen what is it gen Z is the like younger generation than us i don't know what behind the gristler dogler like what the hell are you talking about okay or something like that and that I was just shoveling gizzly after gizzy down my gullet okay I guess a gizzly is a hot dog great he ate a lot of hot dogs okay great so they posted pictures with me it was weird but kind of fun okay so he got a lot of props from the youths okay so they really he really got a lot of attention on that all right you know just living he's like getting thrown in the air like having his big moment the Gatorade so later my girlfriend's dad my girlfriend's dad came up to me shook my hand and said it was a good competition he went home to do something in his workshop so I hung out with my girlfriend Liam and his friends going around to various food stalls and games when we all ate dinner that night you ate after that okay i love that he's like I ate 16 hot dogs and I had to have dinner as you do okay so when I ate dinner later that night the hot dog contest didn't even come up at all except when Liam kept referring to me as the dogler saying that he wanted to make a special dog shirt for me he had Yeah great sounds great we had a nice breakfast the next morning still eating okay no sign that anything was wrong today though so this is like 6 months later right so today my girlfriend brought up in the argument that her dog her dad was actually really wounded by losing the hot dog eating contest but just didn't say anything to me well were you supposed to let him win that's not how contests work wait are men okay what well wait there was more okay I said if I wasn't supposed to enter the contest then was it really a contest at all and she said that it was less about the contest than about the special Doggler shirt liam made his dad a Dogler shirt for the years he won the contest but now I got the Dogler contest shirt if anything you think that like okay so in this family obviously that means a lot so you would think that it would be like an exciting thing like look we're both so talented in this area and we can carry on the legacy in the family golly golly okay she said that her dad only wanted to win the contest to connect with Liam okay so this is like some major like coming of age plot connection between the dad and the son give me a break this has nothing to do with boyfriend to like hug your son without having to shove 16 hot dogs down your throat how about that give him a hug and tell him you love him for crying how loud we know it's hard down no way I'm going to do that give him a hug tell him I love him tell him I'm proud of him uh so that was his way to connect with Liam and if anything I should be able to understand the masculine ego so Reddit am I the a-hole wait posted this shirt is it cool hey let's let it load you're for the people first okay the dog it's like handmade i like that yeah yeah lightning bolts and everything i feel kind of sad for Liam because he seems like a cool dude and like he's just there supporting everyone and being chill and like now they're making it into a thing you know well she's making it into a thing at least well and like if Okay okay let's say this so this is at least a four-year tradition as far as we know how come he didn't know about it yeah he just entered it like randomly and then maybe they just got together not that long ago yeah but that's what I mean it's like well calm down guys it's not that serious it's a freaking hot dog eating contest well it's like what she said though it's like what she said is at the core of the issue it's a what did she say like a basically a strike against dad's like male ego or something like that well that's a him problem that's a problem boyfriend's problem whatsoever masculine need some more hot dogs my problem you can't shovel him back man old man let the best man win call him on the back he said it I'm the best i'm petty man i'd be I' I'd drill so much harder into it too cuz it's not serious it's not serious i think that's the core of the issue though is like if she's not blowing it out of proportion this is actually coming from her dad then like let's think about it her dad's probably at least we'll say around 40 maybe figure it out yeah literally like no no he is not the a-hole at all at all no no uh try therapy you know that might work try therapy yeah try therapy obviously the internet said not the A-le for winning the hot dog eating contest uh no like I'm sorry but if like your ego is that wrapped up in like how many hot dogs you can eat we got issues we've got issues we got issues man and why is the girlfriend holding on to this for 6 months i feel like we also need to like address like this other aspect that just keeps popping into my head like of all the foods that you're like male masculine ego would be like wrapped up in eating can we talk about the fact that it's hot dogs yeah can we talk about that for a second want to talk about that hot dogs really really hot dogs not there's nothing there's nothing not pie there's nothing manlier than shoving a bunch of hot dogs down your throat like I just had to say it mhm mhm all right well I'm glad that's over moving on moving on what do you got was hilarious okay so this one was a Fourth of July one great okay would I be the a-hole if I still used fireworks despite our neighbors request not to okay big point of contention fireworks during this time of year it is it is indeed it is indeed this morning I received a flyer in our mailbox from a neighbor saying to please refrain from using fireworks tomorrow because of her autistic son and two dogs for years a few households in the neighborhood would get together share food and light fireworks together on the 4th i already called a neighbor to discuss this with her and she said her family will still be participating in fireworks and so will others i already bought $200 worth of fireworks and have invited friends and family over to celebrate would I be the a-hole to ignore my neighbor and

continue my tradition edit: 24:44

A neighbor has gone to their house offering to buy ear muffs for her child and invite them to the party but there's no answer on the door we live in Las Vegas where it is legal to light fireworks the week of the 4th as long as they don't rock it leave the ground it's an easy drive to um like a place to get illegal fireworks but those are not the ones that they have would they be the a-hole ooh this is always a sticky one yeah I know i had a hard time with this one too that's why I chose it because I was curious what people would think cuz it's like they say okay so the internet is saying not the a-hole because she waited too long to ask cuz literally it was the day before it was literally the day before yeah yeah cuz it says bought plans already made so I'm going to have to side with that normally I think I would side with the person like requesting like "Hey I have this you know a child with special needs and then I have you know two." I mean we all kind of have dogs so it's like well you know but I think more for like the kids' sake um but like if you're only It's How important is it to you if you're only letting them know the day before yeah yeah don't know yeah and things come up and you get you know behind on stuff and you mean to do it sooner but then at the end of the day you know that's that's unfair too that they already made all these plans at if they were given prior notice with more reasonable time frame they could have made other plans cuz I'm assuming this is like a right next door neighbor so that's really sticky fireworks are a really sticky situation because you know we hope that it's one day and we can make adjustments for people that are needed to be make adjustments for or animals but it truth is people blast them off all month long you know so that's the real issue personally that I have is like it's annoying to just

constantly hear them 2: 26:40

00 in the morning there goes a firework my city it's not even legal and we hear them all the time i don't care about it on Fourth of July personally but it's like okay nobody needs to hear you doing it for every week leading up to it yeah no totally think the neighbor might get off easy because of the day before on this one that's what I thought too mhm know what you guys think i'm curious to see what the masses think about this one if it was if it was you or if it was your neighbor what would you do yeah am I the a-hole for never helping my siblings with their kids at family events dun my husband and I are both child-free and I have multiple siblings each i have three older siblings my sister brother and brother too i have a grand total of 14 nieces and nephews hey this is my family who's writing this uh which is a lot I know my sister has six kids and is a single parent my parents like to host family events and invite all the kids and grandkids they're old and I am cherishing the remaining time that I have with them i don't want to skip these holidays because I know how many I'll have left with them recently at the Fourth of July thing my parents threw for my siblings they went off on me because I never help with their kids quite frankly I don't like almost any of their kids okay so wait okay when they said"In my defense I hate the kids." I mean hey it's pretty simple it's not you guys i don't like your kids cuz at the beginning I thought that's what they were talking about like I don't know how much longer the kids will hang out with us okay uhhuh that was a curveball i wasn't coming i try not to read these ahead of time i just make sure it's like the gist okay the two I like are old enough that they don't even need anything from me changing diapers feeding babies chasing toddlers has no appeal to me and I don't like my siblings enough to want to spend time spend my holiday babysitting for them i just want to spend time with my parents okay hang on so it's not even I want to see my siblings they want to see their parents got it okay this is all making sense now because I don't know how cuz I was like geez bleak i don't know how much longer I have left with my siblings i'm like what okay this is true still but okay talking about the parents as soon as I got there both my sister and brother two number two were asking me to change diapers which they knew I wouldn't do then I'm being asked to help feed the babies which I said no to then I'm asked to help change a toddler that emptied a ketchup bottle on himself and I say no again they know that I have no intentions on child managing so I don't know why they even ask my sister's kids were crying and then she started crying and yelling at me i told them if I wanted to take care of kids I'd have some myself and if she wanted breaks from her six kids with six different debate dads um maybe that was not a good idea that's what they said no judgment's here but that's what they're saying my dad and my husband are both on my side whereas my mom and siblings Oh so it's not her husband getting yelled at either it's the woman so this is a girl writing this okay my dad and my husband are both on my side whereas my mom and siblings all think it's my responsibility as a sibling to help my siblings never help me with anything like ever they wouldn't help me move they wouldn't help me put up a fence when a hurricane took down mine i feel like the relationships are supposed to be a give and take and they all they do is expect to take from me am I the [ __ ] for never helping with child care at family events i don't think so but I think what's happening here is like a breakdown of communication or like perhaps people not respecting other people's boundaries like totally I feel like this person if they don't want to help with the kids that's fine that does not in my opinion that does not make them an a-hole but what they need to do is they need to sit down their brothers and sisters and say when I'm coming to family events and holidays and whatnot it's because I want to spend time with everyone but it is not my responsibility to take care of your kids and I don't want to do it nor will I then it puts everything in the court of the siblings they're either now not respecting your boundaries which is their problem mhm what you know what I mean like I think if they're not communicating that though and they're just expecting their brothers and sisters to understand that inherently then that is their problem for not communicating the boundary you know what I mean yes but honestly though like as someone with children and lots of siblings I just personally would never be like here change my kids diaper here feed my children here clean up this ketchup bottled spilled toddler like I wouldn't you know even though that's great if they want to help i don't think I would ever make anybody feel obligated to do that you know my sister would be the last number five who just had her first baby you know a year ago and up until then and even now I would still wouldn't do that to her you know or even my my or even my sister on the other side of that is five i wouldn't say any obligation to anybody and I just find it interesting that it's it's she's just it's oh you're a sister sibling you have to help yeah you know she didn't sign up for that i think so she didn't sign up to have kids purposely intentionally it sucks that we do have to sometimes establish boundaries but in this family it looks like she's going to have to do that yeah yeah and I think that's what it is it's like you know I I kind of had that like epiphany just from this book that I read i don't know if I've ever shouted it out on here before but I know I've told you about it it's called Set Boundaries Find Peace and it's so good and one of the things that she brings up in there she's a therapist and she's like"You can't get mad at people for not respecting your boundaries if you don't communicate what your boundaries are." M and I'm like that makes complete sense because it's just assuming that like other people know what our boundaries are and can read our mind and so at the end of the day it is up to us to establish our boundaries because other people can't read our minds um then if they decide that they're going to disrespect your boundaries after you've clearly stated them and communicated them now that's a different issue yeah but you know I mean for all like is she saying these things to them or are they like living under the illusion that it's like "Oh well we all help each other so like why isn't this person helping too?" You know what I mean just assuming that they would yeah mhm cuz takes a village and all that yeah exactly so and yeah it's one thing if you're like offering to help or like occasionally helping or like you know some things are within your scope of like I know for me as someone who's childless I feel like the things that I can help with that I'm comfortable helping with are like I can do dishes i can clean up clutter i can you know what I mean like do stuff like that but like I don't necessarily feel super comfortable like Yeah exactly like cleaning up someone's kid cuz like I don't have kids so I'm like what do you even do here i don't know changing a diaper my daughter was the first one I ever changed and I had a ton of kids around me i never changed a diaper before her call me lazy i don't know it's like what i don't know what to do with that like what so it's like you know maybe she's helping her parents in other ways is she helping cook the food is she help you know what I mean so I'm like I don't know it sounds like a breakdown in communication which I feel like is most issues most especially with the am I the a-hole stuff for sure it's miscommunication no the a-hole yeah but might be time to set some clear boundaries but it's a bummer that what a damper on the 4th of July you know you really got to have a nervous breakdown now now now really really okay well at least they're not fighting over hot dog eating yeah you know okay all right what do you got another one bring in the drama with people okay so would I be the a-hole for not letting my boyfriend go on his Fourth of July trip okay let's find out so I a 24 female have been dating my boyfriend 25 male for about a year and a half we do mostly everything together except for most holidays since he and his family are from a different state last year my boyfriend went with his hometown friends on a Fourth of July trip to a lake near Austin Texas since that is the state he grew up in i did not go last year nor was I really invited but I didn't mind because I had other plans with my family and we had only been dating for 5 months but his other friends were taking their girlfriends of two years and the other friend's girlfriends were not even official last year but still went because she knows all of my boyfriend's hometown friends since she lives in Texas now so it sounds like they do this trip and they're all pretty like established but she was like new so she was like "Eh whatever i have my own thing going on." Anyway okay this Fourth of July trip plan rolls around and my boyfriend has been telling me he is excited for me to come this year but my boyfriend does not actually plan the trip because his best friend who's in the group does he informs my boyfriend that there is no space for me this year to come because he forgot about me meanwhile all the other friends girlfriends are invited but me when my boyfriend told me I got really upset because I thought I would get to go from what my boyfriend had said months earlier even though nothing had been planned at that point so then I asked if it was just a boy trip which I would have been fine with and he said no then I asked "Well why don't we do our own thing for the fourth?" But he said he wanted to go on this Fourth of July trip with his friends since he had been doing this for 6 years and never gets to see them since he lives in a different state i have no plans for the fourth and will be just sitting at home and I told him I did not want him to go since I was not invited because I wanted to spend the holiday with him he told me I was being ridiculous and that I could find something else to do for the fourth and not to be so dependent on him would I be the a-hole for not letting him go on the trip h well not to be dramatic but I think this sounds like it's about a year and a half into the relationship this is setting some clear I don't know expectations and where he views her in the space of his life now at about a year a year and a half 5 months okay whatever yeah yeah the next where it sounds like she was planning on for a few months and didn't make other plans it's kind of like uh for me for me if it was me in that situation I'd be like "All right I know where I stand you know and this will probably fade away into not being in that relationship anymore." Yeah what do you mean you don't have space for me i like camping at a lake what do you mean that's like BS this seems like a red flag to me a red flag this is what Yeah because it would be one thing if it was a guy's trip if it's a guy's trip who cares go i don't care right but it's like everyone else is bringing their girlfriend but you're not invited like that to me just screams red flags because because at the bare minimum it seems like he would be like to his friend right if he was a good a good boyfriend he would be like "Hey man that's kind of messed up can we like figure out a way for her to come since like everyone else's girlfriends are coming like she's just going to be at home but every all the rest of you are couples." Like that's weird to me that's weird so there's like a few avenues that it could take for that red flag right could be another girl that's there already right are just stupid and don't think about things right but he's not making sure that there's a space for you in his life is one of them and then the third one help me out here cuz I just forgot[Applause] yeah he's shady and he wants to hang out without you on purpose he's clueless and he's not standing up but then he's not standing not standing up for you yeah exactly and the fact that he is like okay with it and just like I'll figure it out it's kind of like it's a precursor to how you should expect things to move on and move forward in relationships a year and a half I feel like is a pretty good amount of time to have yourself established in a relationship what is that going to look like if say you do have children down the line like how is this dynamic going to continue to play out if it's already happening now that you guys are established from what we're hearing this is giving for any of you guys who have been around for a while and you've watched our holiday episodes remember that episode about the guy who there wasn't enough chairs at Thanksgiving for his girlfriend this is what this is reminding me of like he's not willing to stand up to his mother-in-law who made sure there weren't enough chairs so that she had to sit there awkwardly his ex-girlfriend was still invited to family that's where you're going to end up if you let this continue you're going to end up at Thanksgiving with no chair that is the moral of the story so I mean I don't think she's the the a-hole but the twist is that the internet does oh see okay here's where I'll clarify i don't think she should tell him he can't go mm- break up yeah same yeah yeah it would be like Yeah don't tell him what to do because he just he just showed it's like he just showed who he was he just showed you who he is yeah don't fight it let him be it say goodbye how old are you you're 24 be gone with you yeah go do your own he just showed you who he was believe him yeah exactly happening like you said it's going to be no chair at Thanksgiving good luck yep you're on the pipeline and no chair at Thanksgiving you know and that life is too short to and there's two there's billions of people in the world pick someone else just do it you know yeah you want to pick a guy who will fight for you be Yeah who would be like at the very bare minimum would like look at his friend and be like "What do you mean there's not enough room for my girlfriend why is everyone else bringing their girlfriend?" Like the fact maybe I don't want to go then that's weird yeah it's weird like not the guy who's just going to be like "Why are you making such a big deal you're not invited." Even though everyone else is invited you know what I mean you don't want that guy no red flag red flag red flag red flag yep yeah but don't tell Yeah that's the lesson right that I wish that I would have known when I was in my early 20s like you're not going to change his behavior so just all you can do is choose whether or not you want to be there for that yeah mhm yeah remove yourself at any time yeah yeah do they say she's an a-hole because in general what did the What did those comments say oh I don't know look at all that just that she's an a-hole for not going or for not for for saying he can't go if she says she he can't go that's Yes that would probably be why I would assume yeah like don't tell him what to do yeah don't tell him you can't go just don't be there when he gets back yeah exactly be like "Yeah go." Yeah but see you never yeah we don't need to do this anymore so yeah there you go okay what do you got well I'm nosy and I want to see what this is all about am I the a-hole for accidentally getting my neighbor arrested for shooting off fireworks at midnight my neighbor three houses down is a big fireworks guy every Fourth of July he shoots off a ton of them well into the night for clarification fireworks are illegal where I live but obviously it's a fourth and police aren't really going to crack down on it too hard and I've never had a problem with it so no harm okay however this year he was apparently planning some big show for his family and friends so he's been testing different types of fireworks for the past two weeks this is what I'm talking about my god stuff that I am certain is illegal in all places in all states massive fireworks that you would see at fairs and professional shows being set off in residential neighborhoods the community dangerous yeah it's dangerous fire you're going to catch somebody's house on fire the community I live in is mostly elderly people and some migrant families who do not speak English very well not the type of people who are keen on calling authorities two nights ago was the final

straw for me however it was 12: 42:57

30 at night when the guy starts shooting off something that sounded like a freight train and it exploded right above my house i saw sparks raining down from right outside my window and this idiot and his friends just start cheering and hollering like they won the lottery i called the cops in the morning and to make a long story short he got arrested for the fireworks that he owned they found him his wife must have worked out that it was me who called because she came over and told me my screen door that through my screen door that I'm a terrible person and they were just having some fun what a great guy her husband is and that he might lose his job over this now left me thinking that maybe I should have talked to him about it before calling the cops but Mhm fired that crap way too low and it hit if he had hit my house or anyone else's house they could have been hurt i did not intend for him to get arrest arrested i figured they would just give him a ticket and take the fireworks so am I the a-hole yeah I feel like um you should have talked to him first like just go over there and be like "Hey man like this is kind of uncool and then if he decides to continue then call the cops like I don't feel like the cops should be the immediate response yeah I would say we would have to know the relationship of the neighbors because listen I live in a very small community and there are people that you would not be able to talk to about that ahead of time yeah yeah they would they would 100% know if you ended up calling the cops if they didn't do it and they would retaliate you know yeah um or they would just be crazy at you but then I have a lot of most of my neighbors I'd be like"Oh yeah sure yeah we'll stop." You know so it just depends cuz to me this and I don't know this person this person could be passive aggressive so yeah they'll just call the cops and let them handle it or they could already have a history with this neighbor we don't know any of that so that's tricky because he also didn't think he was going to get arrested i wouldn't think somebody would get arrested either no but that like that kind of tells me like what was he doing did he have how much fireworks did he have in there man go to blow up or like was this not his first offense and that's why he got arrested you know what I mean um so yeah I mean it depends on the dynamics able to search his house too did he just have them all out there like come on it's you there's some unanswered questions here like how much fireworks we talking here people's like houses have blown up from storing explo illegal fireworks inappropriately so hey maybe it needed to happen oo yeah ooh um I'd say like if you and your neighbor have like a normal relationship and like you can communicate and they're not crazy then yeah obviously talk to them first if you have a history and you know that they're just going to be crazy then maybe call is the best option might be safer to call the cops this guy has a lot of access to fire weapons so I don't know it could go either way you know he's got to cuz then then you could have somebody that's still really crazy and purposely shooting him to your house you know and you're going to have to call the cops anyways so maybe that's what they sorted out who knows but yeah the internet voted not the a-hole you got to do what you got to do especially because it's oh two weeks leading up to it so yeah it's a lot all right okay what do you got am I the a-hole for refusing to eat pork even though it's the 4th of July what is that a thing I didn't know about like a tra like turkey on Thanksgiving i don't know that's why I chose this one i was like I love this okay all right i have chronic migraines one of my triggers is pork which is a problem considering I'm from a barbecue city okay okay my family Louis Texas where are we talking yeah exactly my family loves pork and has even tried to trick me into eating it before my before by sneaking bacon into food specifically on my dad's side guys that's weird let people live their life un unpaffected jeez oh jeez i was over at their house and they had three racks of ribs for four people they also had sausage so I was intending on only eating the sides i mentioned this to my dad and his wife goes "Come on it's the fourth." Okay you can eat just a little and we spent so much i replied I don't think you heard what you just said so I am going to let you retry saying something else apparently that was disrespectful and rude and my father wanted me to apologize i have not apologized the thing is this is not the first time that she specifically has overlooked my food quote unquote preferences as she calls it i have multiple allergies and she has stated that they will not cater to my preferences even though I could die i have said that I won't be going to events where there will be food or I where there will be food or I will eat before she thinks it's disrespectful to her food she also threw away She also threw away my EpiPen because it was clutter and she doesn't like needles those are like 500 bucks now yeah this specific food problem is not fatal but I feel justified in standing up for myself but I could have worded it a little differently so am I the a-hole no this one's easy you're not the a-hole god I just I chose this one because I was like why are people so freaking crazy over food stuff yeah i don't know i don't know it's bizarre to me it's like literally cra like you have to eat the pork on four it's the 4th of July obviously you have to eat this no I don't 16 hot dogs obviously what so crazy the a-hole yeah I can't even imagine like that's so crazy to me and sneaking it in like it's okay it's getting creepy at this point like leave me alone leave me alone all right for fun let's throw in some bonus ones right okay so let's let's do another hot dog round shall we am I the a-hole for eating my brother's hot dog okay okay so this isn't super serious thank you for clarifying wait I feel like what this is teaching us is that we just need to do an Am I the a-hole hot dog edition and just see what we can come up with why are there so many why are there so many easier to find hot dog related stuff than just Fourth of July stuff okay so anyways this isn't super serious but my brother did get really mad at me about it so I'm wondering if I'm the a-hole here okay i 26 female was at a football game with my brother 18 male last week and I got up to get a Coke my brother asked me to get him some nachos and I said "Okay." Conc concession stand closest to us that I went to didn't have nachos and only had hot dogs my cell service was bad in the stadium so I couldn't text him and ask if he wanted a hot dog instead i was going to just go back and ask if he wanted anything but decided to get a hot dog in case he wanted one and if he didn't I'd ate it because I was kind of hungry myself all right that's all good reasoning these are decisions I would make we're setting this up so thoroughly good backstory appreciate it yeah yeah it's like reading a novel okay when I got back to him and my dad they were both gone to the bathroom I presumed so while waiting to go while waiting I got really hungry and I ate the hot dog and I figured I would just go back and get him one if he wanted something yeah like no big deal okay he didn't even He didn't even know a hot dog was coming okay no you can't miss something you didn't know you had or can you guys tell that to my kids golly when they got back my brother asked if I got him nachos and I informed him that they didn't have nachos only hot dogs this where they This is where they made the mistake this is where they should have stopped talking okay right here we feel the moment that it all went south i informed him that they didn't have nachos only hot dogs and that I got him one but I was hungry and I ate it so I would go back and get him one if he wanted shouldn't have told him though cuz then he then he missed it he got so mad and said I was wrong for eating the hot dog wrong morally wrong for eating the hot dog and he was irritated the rest of the night that's crazy okay are men okay like literally moral of the story don't touch a man with a good hot dog like otherwise it's going bad like what is going on hey this week think of us when you see hot dogs and if you end up having a hot dog story please for the love of the crows send it to us there's a am I the a-hole moment i ate all 16 hot dogs before my family came back from the lake okay am I the a-hole okay so I asked him multiple times if he wanted me to go get something and he just refused my dad said he sulked the whole rest of the night i probably could have handled this better but am I really the a-hole here no the rest of the night understand was he just hangry like does he just need some pain yeah yeah sounds like it well you got two legs go get it then i know or she even offered to go get you like why go find the nachos i'm sure one of the stands has it figure it out it's weird it's weird it's weird assuming the brother's around the same age too they said he was 18 i thought I thought they said 18 oh yeah sorry 18 okay then your dad then dad needs to handle it tell your kid to suck it up butterfly and also he's 18 he's not 10 exactly yeah exactly and a 10-year-old would let that go too jeez the first comment says "Sounds like everyone was hangry next time buy two hot dogs." Yeah buy 16 hot dogs i dare say"But they were voted not the a-hole." So that's good because they didn't do anything wrong oh good stuff okay all right last one right am I the a-hole for putting up Halloween decorations in July a summerween happy summer everybody that's really what we should do summerween episode yeah there you go so last night along with our youngest daughter who's eight I decided to put up some Halloween decorations my husband was going out with our middle daughter for the night but before he left I asked him to bring up the box of new Halloween decorations I had purchased he did no problem my daughter and I spent about 20 to 30 minutes just decorating the mantle when he came home that night I was in bed with our youngest he walked in the door and yelled "What the hell is going on here?" He was beyond upset over decorating okay yeah he came upstairs and said I didn't ask him if I could put up the decorations and didn't include them he also said he had no idea I was going to be doing this even though he brought the decorations up for me i don't understand what the big deal is yeah I get it it's July and most people don't decorate for Halloween this early but who cares halloween is my favorite holiday seeing it makes me happy and helps with my depression on top of that I'm going in for surgery in August and I won't be allowed to do much for at least six week after 6 weeks after so am I the a-hole moral of the story with all of these it's not that deep guys calm down why does he care literally I just have to take this opportunity to give my husband a shout out okay literally I used to only decorate for Halloween on the 1st of October cuz I was trying to not make it crazy right well then he was like "Well that doesn't give you enough time to enjoy it." So he's like "Why don't you just do it at the beginning of September?" Because that's my birthday yeah and I was like "Okay." So I started doing it at the beginning of September okay literally just in case you guys haven't seen this on social media Michael's just came out with all their Halloween stuff so it's officially out okay i told my husband that he was on it so fast yesterday we ordered our first Halloween Town decoration and he literally goes "Yeah put it up as early as you want." Oh I love that that's good i know see that's what your husband should do yeah like literally we're all on this floating rock together like none of it matters who cares it's all made up put up the Halloween decorations if you want who cares whenever you want literally whenever you want that's even better reasoning that she has because I've been in that position too that it's like I'm not going to even have time to decorate when the technically allowed time would be you know so if July is the last moment that they can put do it pretty much whatever who cares who cares not the internet says she is not the a-hole i know i'm like I'd be like "Oh I'm sorry are you going to decorate the house?" Yeah you're not or you'll say you are to try to prove a point right now but you still won't and also it doesn't matter yeah it doesn't matter it literally doesn't matter so yeah actually the one that we got I have to tell you guys cuz we have like a whole Halloween town you know that we put out and so we buy like usually one new one to add like to our Halloween town and our Christmas town every year or whatever and they had one that looks like an old haunted blockbuster oh that's awesome and so that's the one we got this year good way to circle back to the beginning here with video stores i know love when that works out oh that's cute that is cute all right well you guys let us know over on Instagram when we post these this week which will probably be Wednesday I think so we'll post it to the people you can vote on the polls a-holes or not a-holes and please like we said send us your hot dog stories hot dog stories fourth of July stories we'll repost it it's a hot dog Fourth of July story okay what have we learned today we've learned that the Fourth of July really is just a holiday about eating hot dogs and allies and fire not even fireworks fireworks as a problem i do like the drone shows that some pe some like lakes and stuff will do they're really cool yeah that is cool yeah um but I got to be honest all this hot dog talk sure is making me hungry not going to lie i literally and I'm not making this up I literally ate hot dogs today i'm not kidding Liz way to buy like I'm not even kidding that's what I cooked myself for lunch before this that's hilarious that's hilarious she didn't even know I had the hot dog stories i surprised her with that no idea they just sounded good you know yeah i mean hey who doesn't love a good hot dog or 16 you know all right well you guys we got to do an unhinged smasher pass it is your turn to go first I think well I went with the like summer Fourth of July theme same good good good okay so it's it's multi-layered okay love a good layer so so Smasher Pass Christopher Maloney as Jean the Cook in Wet Hot American Summer you got to show me who that is again i'm bad with names he's one of my favorites he's a smash for me for sure because he's just so unhinged i'm I'm forgetting who You've seen Wet Hot American Summer with Paul Red yes the crazy cook hold on there's so many people in that oh yeah smash smash yeah multi-layer do I have to pick between him and somebody else no no no okay so that's just layer one okay so I'll I'll I'll pull up another photo of him because he inspired the second layer of this discussion okay so I'll just show it to you so this is him okay so he's got So my second part of this would be smash or pass a crop top on a man you know if the shoe fits wear it you know if the shoe fits wear it say that i wasn't thinking about that the other day you know specifically specifically oddly just like you eating a hot dog before this I was wearing a crop top and I was like "Dang they just don't make men's men wearing crop tops like they used to in the '8s." And especially cuz we weren't really around for that time but they we'd see like you know the old '8s like shows where they're roller skating with their crop tops and speech it's like you get it man it's always ripped and tan so go for it you know I am a thousand% in support of the man crop top coming back just do it why not easy breezy beautiful covergirl let's go i agree bring it back i'm glad that we're in agreement on that hopefully i think you guys I think I think it's going to be a pretty common you know you guys are going to agree i think you know it's something that I think we need to let people know that we want back because I think it's not talked about i think as we as a community talked about that A+ sounds good you know crop tops on men A+ but they have to it has to work you know has to work has to work has to work with their vibe they can't you can't force it you know if you if you it's your vibe or not or else it seems forced even like I love like short board shorts great but sometimes it just doesn't work with their aesthetic you know not about physically just like their vibe as a person yeah short board short and a nice thick thigh yeah cassian would be all over both of those cassian shorts and a crop top he'd be in just like talking about guys wearing tiny clothes now it's so funny to visualize though like the giant ones yeah it is funny but that's the thing is like you can pull off the short shorts better if you do have buffer legs and if you have a bit of a sense of humor too yeah a sense of you got to be a little silly yeah you got to be a little silly you know yeah yeah brings a sense cuz I'm not taking you seriously that's for sure you know I mean Well that's why that's why we had to build off of the cook from Wet Hot American Summer because he brings that crazy funny energy yes looking for yeah that's all we're looking for in life yep oh my god I love it okay well I got a whiplash for you here okay great smash or pass walker Texas Ranger i think that that's a pass but like cuz who plays him there been like a few i think it's just one dude no no i think that you're wrong probably the original that was Chuck Norris chuck Norris yes Chuck Norris i'm not a Chuck Norris lady so I will say pass sorry about it sorry for me however the new Walker Texas Ranger is freaking Jar is Jared Pedlei yeah that's his name the uh brother from Supernatural this guy brother you see him oh well that changes things so Jared Pedlei I think that's how you say his name guys you guys know I saw him in Vegas one time he is tall so he's very tall chuck Norris not so much smash for sure winchester if it's a Winchester brother or dad let's be honest it's a smash so you know but yeah the original that's a no yeah no no wouldn't cross him cuz he can kick some booty that's okay stay on his good side okay so we're in agreement on this then so the old version no the new version yes yeah that's a given though it's less unhinged yeah it is less it has to be the old one that we're talking about cuz there's going to be people out there is like"Hey well yeah." Mhm yeah it's true a lot of people are into Chuck Norris i remember my one of my college roommates was very into him see see there you go something for everyone all right you got Walker Texas Ranger and tiny shorts and a crop top and a cowboy hat you're welcome for this picture that we're painting for you a little bit better it's a little bit better not going to lie mhm if you got it flaunted that's my opinion for everyone out there totally do it million% if you don't got it flaunted if it's your vibe do it if you want to do it it's it's about the energy you bring to the table you got to just be confident just do it work it it's Britney [ __ ] okay so you guys thank you so much for joining us for this another round of Am I the a-hole holiday edition this time Hot Dogs and Fourth of July we appreciate your time don't forget to like follow and subscribe anywhere you listen to your favorite podcast including YouTube and go check us out on Instagram and Tik Tok at Besties in the Books Podcast but you guys we'll see you next Tuesday but whoa hey bye oh wait also maybe Anna Green Gable soon so watch out for Friday maybe Friday no yeah okay bye but not this Friday soon okay[Music]