Ep 87 We Read the Most UNHINGED Thanksgiving Smut on Kindle Unlimited 😳🦃 | CRINGEY HOLIDAY BOOKS!

Today we’re bringing you our reviews and unhinged deeeep dives on two of the most “cringy” sounding Thanksgiving themed romance novellas we could find on Kindle Unlimited. 

As we continue this time honored tradition of bringing you the holiday smut, we want you to know that even if we don’t love it (but hey, we might though…) we’re happy if you do. Because there truly is something for everyone, even if that something is three turkey basters with the capability to impregnate you with their… juices. 🤷‍♀️😂

Today we’ll be covering Basted by Abby Hunter and Home for the Gobble Days by Latrexa Nova. We have spoiler free star and spice ratings, what we loved, what gave us the ick, fun quotes, the SMOT™ ratio, and good old fashioned quotes, where quotes are due.

The innuendos are strong, the Thanksgiving references aplenty, and the ghost pilgrim orgies might just surprise you with their subtle important message…so listen on if that, a fave and fail, and a smash or pass turkey day edition sounds like a nice break from the holiday madness. 

Don't be shy, subscribe! New Podcasts every Tuesday!! (And sometimes Friday!…)

Check out these author interviews? ⬇️

Need more Halloween reads in your life? Find out if “Halloweentown for adults” with Gilmore Girls vibes might be for you with our Haven Ever After Hazel Mack Interview! https://youtu.be/-kDxchCTysw?si=KpEbcsCHAniU-JTS

Penn Cole talks with us about Strong Female Characters, Feminist Themes, and her debut bestselling Spark of the Everflame Series! https://youtu.be/7ukNImyoObw?si=7C3Y9kOUMN4hfcKb

We interviewed Callie Hart all about her NYT Bestseller Quicksilver! Watch it here! https://youtu.be/CED5s7qDBdQ?si=8xtIRO1IzX6Rsld4

Check the official Follow Up Author Interview with Lindsay Straube of the Split or Swallow Universe all about Between Two Kings! https://youtu.be/OW1cxXTVcTc?si=oOxVIzbIheET_bNE

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Ashley is wearing A Pumpkin Book Fall Thanksgiving Sweater from @BookBabeDesigns | https://bookbabedesigns.com

Liz is wearing a Serpent and the Wings of Night Hoodie from @ Willow and Co (out of business :( ) 

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Chapters

• 0:00 Spoiler Free Intro
• 6:09 Fav and Fails of the Week
• 13:30 Home for the Gobble Days Book Review & Spice Rating
• 16:20 SPOILERS! Home for the Gobble Days Discussion
• 32:35 Basted Book Review & Spice Rating
• 35:50 SPOILERS! Basted Book Discussion
• 51:04 Thanksgiving Smut and Romance Books
• 55:17 Unhinged Smash or Pass Thanksgiving Theme

Transcript

I've never read anything else like it. It was so out there. Imagine how silly with their little buckle hats and their little buckle shoes. Three semi-corporeal baster dudes and their turkey children. It was a good warmhearted story for for Thanksgiving.

Welcome to the Besties in the Books podcast, guys. I'm Liz. And I'm Ashley. What's up? Hope you guys are cozy and hanging out in this wintry week. It's got a fall winter transition this week if you will in we're pre-f filming but in you know in future in future dome I think. Hey it's got cold where we are. So yeah feels cold to me. Our Southern California has a mind of its own. It doesn't know what it wants. So cold hot and cold like Katy Perry says. So, hey, we're here to give you another unhinged, cringey Thanksgiving read. We're so excited cuz well, hey, these are crazy. Okay, these are crazy. Literally, if if some of you read it, you know, when we announced this, thank you so much. Um, how'd you do? Are you okay? Do you want to talk it out? Okay. Probably not. I wasn't okay for like that day. Yeah. Yeah. Liz especially, I felt extra bad for her, which we'll talk about. But this has become quite a tradition over here. If this is your first time jumping in to one of these unhinged books, review situations that we're going to be discussing today. We have a bit of a holiday holiday tradan, if you will, tradition where we like to read two unhinged, usually nollas, you know, just to get us in the mood, to get us in the spirit, and we try to make it as unhinged as possible. And listen, I think these ones They checked that box, if you will. For real. Literally, though. Yeah. Unhinged category. Yeah. So, hey, you know, if you want to read these two and you haven't had a chance yet, you don't want anything spoiled, well, you could save this to your playlist, listen to later, and then grab these books. Um, you know, they're on Kindle Unlimited if you have that. They're only like 69 pages each. Literally. Heyo. Pretty sure they both were. So, if you're here for the spices, here for the laughs, here for the who knows what, you know, welcome one and all. Yeah. I mean, if you just want to find out why are these so unhinged and then go read them out of sheer morbid curiosity, we welcome you to do so. Hey, cuz listen, we are not going to be able to like fully paint the unhinged picture. There's no way that you just you'd have to experience it on yourself. So, get your little teasers here and then go full steam ahead. Yeah, you're welcome. So, don't say we didn't warn you. I know, right? So, we just, you know, search for the cringiest sounding books we can find on Kindle Unlimited. Good old KU, you know, under Thanksgiving smut category, which actually has quite a selection. You wouldn't think so, but we're being served more now, too. So, there's that. Once you start your algorithm, it doesn't stop. It doesn't stop. So, here we are. Uh, so what did we land on this time? We landed on Home for the Gobble Days, which I mean, if you got to hand it to her, that is a good title. Um, by Latrexa Nova. So, it's I Got You Boo, book one. So, it's part of a series. Okay. Uh, can be read as part of a series or standalone, whatever you want to do. And we also read Basted, a Thanksgiving sentient object romance by Abby Hunter. Yep. It's just called Basted. So yeah, stick around for that. Uh, yeah, full disclaimer, these episodes will be a bit more explicit than our usual. If you guys have been around for a while and have, you know, been here through a few of our cringey reads, perhaps full sack from last Thanksgiving, you know how these might go down. So through the eggs. Yeah, through the eggs of Crow. If you don't know what we're talking about, look that up. Um, you know, we're here to have a good time, but just know that this might not be sensible for everyone's ears going forward. First 15 minutes or so will be spoiler-free. We'll be doing our phase and fails of the week. We'll also be giving you um, you know, our spoiler-free review starting with Home for the Gobble Days. So, before we get into all that, we just want to say thank you so much for being here. Seriously, thank you so much for taking time out of your day and your book and maybe your hectic life this week, you know, to come and listen to us what us weirdos read this week and what do we have to say about it? It means so much to us. Make sure to like, follow, and subscribe anywhere you like to listen your favorite podcast, including YouTube. We're hanging out over there in our, you know, fallish looking vibes. Super fun, cozy. My only orange sweatshirt, I think. Yeah, I love it. So cute. I got a pumpkin and a book. It's so cute. We're also on Tik Tok and Instagram at besties and books podcast everywhere. And that's where you can see announcements in our stories on what unhinged books we are reading for what upcoming holiday. So if it's like, oh, Thanksgiving's coming. I got to go check out what those besties are reading and see if I want to take a a gobble at the gander, you know? I don't know. Hey, so you can do that. Also, I do want to say these books are a smutty fun time and we are going to be poking a lot of fun and laughing a lot. We're not trying to kink shame, you know, or hey, like what you like, like what you don't, don't like what you don't like. We're not here to make fun of you and anybody anything anybody likes, but um we're also not going to be holding back on our thoughts and feels of what we don't like. Yeah. So, hey. Yeah. We encourage you to like what you like, but we also make fun of everything, including stuff we like. So, there's that. Yeah. Exactly. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So, hey, nobody's making us read these either, so this is our own free will. This is how we spend our free time. Okay. So, jokes's on us really at the end of the day. So, what's your fave of the week before we move into uh these unhinged? Yeah. Well, we're pre-filming this a little bit. We just finished out a very strong Halloween weekend, preh Halloween weekend. So, my favorite was doing all the Halloween things. So, first we kicked it off with the San Diego Zoo does a like how glowing after it's not after hours, but like they keep the park open later. Certain like the nocturnal area and stuff. So, super cute. And like the sky far tram is open and stuff so you can see San Diego lit up at night. So, we went to do that cuz we have passes there. So, that was fun. We could only go for a few hours but it was great. And then uh my sister met up with us with her baby and husband. So, super cute. And then the next day we did my daughter's uh school bash, boo bash, you know. So that was cute seeing them with their friends running around. So that was exciting. And then Saturday, See, I'm starting to forget what we did for everything. Saturday was what? No, Saturday was the zoo. Sorry. Thursday was our gym does a boo bash also. And we only went for an hour. It was like a quick stop by something to do with the kids, you know, but they dressed up and stuff and it was super cute again. They got to go see all their friends. So, like we went hard this year on one weekend. We crammed it all in. And then Sunday, my family, my parents were in town and we were going to do a pumpkin patch or something. But listen, we're all pumpkin patches and parking lots over here. It sucks. So, we went with just going down to Downtown Disney and taking a stroll and hanging out, seeing their cute stuff, eating the yummy food cuz they had like a pamphlet of all the specialty food stuff that was around. So, I had like a yummy churo. I did make a I blacked out sometimes. Do you ever black out and order the wrong thing? Cuz that was me. So, my daughter had seen one of the churo stands had pumpkin spice churro. And listen, I love pumpkin spice and I am kind of picky with churros. I don't like them all, you know, but pumpkin spice, I'm like, "Oh, yeah, for sure." And then when I got to the thing, I saw on the menu it was like called a Boo Churro or something like that. Something something folly it was called. And so I thought that was the pumpkin spice one, but then it also had like peanut butter M&M's and stuff all over it. I'm like, "Hey, I like peanut butter M&M's." Kind of a weird combo, but we'll try it out. Well, that was the wrong thing, but that's all right. So, I ordered that. It was fine. I sometimes feel like they do too much with churros. I like it when Disneyland does the churros like the seasoning is the different flavors. So like pumpkin spice. So it's a little different than a churo, but you still are eating a churro. They have one in the winter called uh sugar plum churo. So it's like a different sugar base. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? Those are the best. This one was like it was just too it was just too much too intense. It took away from the churoness of the churo. So I after two bites I'm like wow I don't want this anymore. So yeah, that's a bit of a fail, if you will, you know. So yeah, with that said, my fail was I was so tired. We were all so tired. We did so much. So if I would have it any other way, it would be to space things out, but you can't. The San Diego Zoo thing, it was the last weekend we could do it, and I didn't know that it was only on weekends because we were trying to do it during the week, but I couldn't. So yeah, it's like everything's very time. I wouldn't. It was too much. And the weekend before we were sick, so I couldn't do anything else then was what I was supposed to be see my parents then. So we had to compound everything into one weekend. Yeah. I need to just start doing the fall things at the beginning of fall beginning of October and just like spread them out over the weekends or something. Yeah, cuz it's too much. Yeah, I get. Yeah. All right. What about you? Uh well, my fave right now is that I like I had a small menty bee and so I took a week off of work. Yeah. Um, so it is a fave because I'm calling it a station, but really it was like I needed some time to myself. So I am fully enjoying having a week to like like I um got like the big Disney castle Lego. Like I want to work on that. Yeah. Like just little stuff like that, you know, that normally like I wouldn't really have time to do if I was working. So um yeah, like that. And then obviously reading and all that kind of good stuff. So that I'm fully trying to like immerse myself and enjoy this week off. That was like unexpected that I kind of took last minute. Um Well, and when you took it off for your birthday week, you were sick, so you didn't get to enjoy that at all. No. Yeah. Like literally Yeah, exactly. That's what I told my husband. I was like, I meant to do this over my birthday and then I just spent the whole weekend ill. So, and then I just had to go back to work, you know. You owed it to yourself. For sure. Yeah, for sure. So, this is my makeup week for that. So very exciting. We did go and see the Rocky Horror Picture Show play the other night. That was really fun. Um, so my fail is just that when I have like unexpected time like this, cuz I only took it off with like very like minimal notice or whatever. Um, cuz it had to kind of like work out with work just right. And so I feel like I just put ADHD is getting me. I'm like I feel like it's one of those things where I have so many things I want to do that it's like I have a really hard time just like relaxing because I'm like I have been trying to clean my closets out for 2 years like and I haven't had any time and so I'm like okay I really want to do that but then I'm like do I really want to spend my time off just cleaning my closets out but it needs to get done otherwise it's probably going to be another year before I get around to it and like just stuff like that you know where I'm like oh I need to do laundry oh I need to like, you know, do this chore and that chore and like run this errand and I haven't had time to do this in a year and it needs to get done. So, I'm trying to not let that like overtake my whole time off, but like also use my time somewhat wisely to get some things done that need to get done. But yeah, you know how that is. It's like all I want to do is just sit down and read and then I get distracted by like 7,000 side quests and then I do nothing that I wanted to do, you know? Yeah, it's hard. Adulting is hard. That's I miss being a kid because you didn't really have to do anything. Right. Right. Really? Like oh school? Oh no. It's like go hang out with your friends all day. You have to do all the laundry and vacuum. I mean we did have chores but like it's different when you're the sole reason only. You know you won't have dinner. Like if you don't make it like you will not have clean underwear if you don't wash it. Nobody's coming to rescue you. It's true. It's true. So yeah. uh enjoying station trying not to like let it get co-opted by responsibilities. But hey, that's hard. Oh, it's so hard cuz then it feels like you can't enjoy it while you are trying to you're like whatever, I'll just read. Oh, but then you can't cuz you're thinking about it the whole time. Yeah. Exactly. So, and then it's like, well, might as well just go get it done and then reward myself, but then that turns into like 19 things. Yeah. And then you don't ever have any time to reward yourself. Yeah. Yeah. Because the list is never ending. That is the truth. Yeah. So, the fail is having to be an adult. Yeah. Yeah. It sucks. Do not recommend. Yeah. Um, so, all right, here we go. Should we just start talking about Home for the Gobble Days? Let's go. Let's go. Home for the Gobble Days. All right, Ash, why don't you just tell us what your one sentence star review and spice rating and if you'd recommend it. Why don't you just like hit us with that info right off the bat? All right. You know what? Four stars, I suppose. Hey. Okay. Plot was followed. Plot was followed through. Mhm. The bar is low when it comes to these things, right? Cuz we're not talking like quality pullet surprisewinning novels. All right. It's just we we're basing it. It's entertainment. We're basing out what it will. So, four stars cuz it followed through on the plot. It was unhinged as promised. Okay. uh flowed and it made sense. All right, that's my review. Would I recommend it? Perhaps if you would like a heavily unhinged Halloween transition into Thanksgiving novella. Mhm. Cuz it has some surprising spooky vibes. Yeah. So, I'll leave it at that because I don't want to spoil anything. Yeah. Uh what would you say for Do you have a spice rating or do you want to just defer to mine? I'll let you lead the way, my pumpkin spice girl. Okay. Uh, okay. I rated Home for the Gobble Days three stars. I found it mildly entertaining. It was definitely unhinged. It was Thanksgivingy enough, so that's good. Yeah. Um, but didn't love it. Wasn't necessarily like I don't know completely wowed by any of it or disturbed by any of it. I feel like that'll also get the the rating up, right? If I'm like, "Whoa, that's disturbing." Okay, star ratings goes up because it's unique, right? So, it definitely was unique, but I feel like it just didn't quite strike a chord with me. So, that's why I gave it a three. It's like it's all vibes when we're talking about these kind of books, guys. Yeah. Yeah. Um and then I rated it at a four. Spice wasn't quite a five. A four. I landed on a four. Yeah. Mhm. Sounds good. Sounds good. I feel like I mean there could potentially be things that are triggering to you, but it was more like outlandish kind of stuff. So yeah, check the trigger warnings if you're concerned about it. But yeah, it was definitely a time. Yeah. Yeah. It was a big portion of the plot. We'll put it we'll put it that way for sure. Uh I would recommend it to anyone who is just wanting to read something short, silly, kind of funny with like some unhinged spice in there. holiday related. If you need to get out of your Thanksgiving stress headspace and just want a good laugh, go read it. There you go. Yeah. Yep. Yeah. Okay. So, Ash, why don't you tell us what it's about? Why don't we get into the spoiler section? You just tell us what All right. Turkey. Yeah, that's the sound of the spoilers for today. I think it's fitting. If you don't want any spoilers, go on. Good. If that stroke your fancy and you're intrigued and you want to pause it, we get it. If you want to go full steam ahead, let's go. All right, here's a rough summary. A smutty almost romcom start maybe for a couple headed to the boyfriend's family home for Thanksgiving weekend. Okay, smutty time ensues, but yeah, we're off to like a pretty normie start for the most part. Yeah. Uh then we get then we get talk of some some maybe demons and ghosts haunting the FMC um and some times that she she had a consenting good time with might have needed to be exercised a little bit. Hey. Um, you got some edge lording fun mixed with a odd family who has ties to original Anglo-Saxon settlers. Turns into an extra strange fast time or a extra strange time in the forest when some ghosty friends enter the consenting chat until is it consenting for very long? Evil or good? I guess you have to read it to find out. Actually, we're in the spoiler section, so I could tell you. But hey, listen. I mean, literally, okay, they go to this chick's boyfriend's house. She's had paranormal experiences in the past, so we kind of get the idea that maybe they follow her a little bit, like she's a conduit for some kind of like supernatural stuff. Magnet. Yeah. Magnet. Yeah. And so, um, his family who's like obsessed with like Salem, Massachusetts, like early, you know, settler quote unquote lore. They're not only obsessed with it, they have like family connections to it. Yeah. Yeah. But they're like obsess like it's like their whole personality, you know? Yeah. Yeah. So, basically what ends up happening is like a ghost pilgrim orgy in the forest. Yeah. Ghost pilgrims. Ghost pilgrims. ghost. Okay, so I wrote down a couple of my thoughts I had while reading this. One of them was, okay, oh no, is this going to be a pilgrim ghost? Like, you know, once we get to a certain part, we're like predicting, oh no. Yeah. Oh no. And then later I write, oh no, it is a pilgrim ghost. It's pilgrim ghosts. Like imagine how silly with their little buckle hats and their little buckle shoes and their stockings and they're like kind of demonic. Yeah. And it's like that's silly. But that's I mean she even silly. She even comments. She's like it was kind of refreshing to like see them get down, you know, cuz they were so like uptight, you know, so so religious. Be so mean about it though, you know, like they wouldn't be cool about and they weren't cool about it. They were pretty crazy. They were pretty crazy. I mean, okay, my other thought was, "Oh no, is the screw going to be a ghost? Oh no, it's somehow so much worse than a ghost. The ghosts are trying to use the screw to screw the dude." So, in a ritual to release themselves. So, okay, let's explain the screw cuz the screw is a major Oh my gosh, a stupid screw component. Okay. So, basically this was like a heirloom that like the family kept in their like I don't know heirloom area or whatever. And what what was it like from I mean it's like a rusty old screw from something from the like pilgrimage days. Like was it like from one of those generations or something like that maybe like from the flowers? Pilgrimy. Yeah. Sure. Yeah. Well, it gets stolen by the ghost. Well, it goes Yeah. gets missing and they're blaming. So it's like a who blame game. It's like some you know cuz it's like all the families visiting. Yeah. So it's kind of it feels weird cuz you're getting like okay this is like those weird family like you know not Hallmark movies but silly Yeah. romcom movies but then you have like this weird ghost entity and like missing screws and pilgrims and the problematicness of that in and of itself you know. Yeah. So it goes missing. The ghosts steal it and then everything everyone's having a good time. So, the boyfriend's having a good time, she's having a good time, all the pilgrim ghosts, everyone's having a good old orgy of a time, but then the screw comes out and it's like big and rusty and it's presumably going to go into places and that's where things go bad and they're like, "We have to get out of this situation." And so, basically what ends up happening, I don't even remember how this got resolved. They get they exercise the ghost. They call, they phone a friend that helped exercise her before from her demon ghost and she's like, "Dang, it's happening again." She's like, "This is what you do." They exercise the ghost. And they get rid of him. And all is well. But but you know, it's he is a loving MC and he loves it. Yeah. All the more stronger. Yeah. They even talk about potentially becoming ghost hunters together so that they could have more more ghost orgies in the future. Yeah. So beautiful. That's great. Beautiful. For sure. Um, so what was something that you really liked about this book if you had to choose something? Uh, you know what? Spooky Thanksgiving. Different take. I didn't like the pilgrims being the spooky thing necessarily, but like, hey, I haven't read a spooky ghost Thanksgiving story, so uniqueness. Unique. Unique in New York. Yeah, for sure. Yeah. What about you? What did you like? Um, I put horny pilgrims are hilarious. It was so funny. It was funny. I For better or worse, the writing style was good cuz I envisioned the whole thing. Yeah, it's true. So, good world building, good imagery. Um, I did want to hear though that on a more serious note, this story had unexpected important themes woven throughout. Um, it did including the author's note at the end, which did you read the author's note? Yeah. Um, basically here, let me like pull it up really quick. But she talks about what Thanksgiving actually is. And I thought that was really important. So, we'll just say note from the author. So, she goes on to, you know, say which tribes the story was written on the traditional lands of. Then she goes on to tell the real story of what happened during, you know, quote unquote like Thanksgiving, um, and who that impacted and how that story has been co-opted, um, to, you know, push through a very American white agenda. Um, so yeah, if you are like read this silly little story and you're like, "Oh my gosh, like this was unhinged." I would I would recommend reading the author's note because I feel like, you know, there were some important themes in here that like we'll pick through when we go through the quote section. Um, but I feel like she's also, you know, it just goes to show how authors and just people in general can use like these different forms of media to really work through some more important topics. So that's something that I did appreciate about this author in this book. And I liked that in the book she was calling it out too, you know, cuz I was like, "Ooh, problematic pilgrims." Like, "Oh, no." You know, and the FMC was calling out some things that she saw, you know. Yeah. Cuz Yeah. It helped me as a reader be like, "Okay, you know, like acknowledging the elephant in the room." Yeah. that wasn't like glorifying Thanksgiving, right, by any that's what I was so worried about too, you know. Yeah. It was not with the family's obsession with it, you know. Yeah. So, yeah. She's like, "This is weird." So, what about something that you didn't like? Pilgrims old rusty screws. Yeah, I put the old rusty screw. That's literally what I put. I was like, it creates a visual that like I don't want in my brain. I don't like it's like a little too horror adjacent. Yeah. Like imagine like a ghost pilgrim coming at you with this giant rusty screw. Not good. Not good. Scary. Too horrory. Yeah. Yeah. Horror. A little bit of horror. Yeah. Horrifying. Um, how would you say the plot versus smut ratio was? So smut, if you will. I actually felt like was solid. Solid smut. Same. I would style book. more more smut than plot, but for a book like this, that's what I would expect and want. And I felt like the plot followed through cuz I hate it when it's buildup and then it's fizzles. So, yeah, it was resolved. It made sense the way that it was resolved. Um, I felt like the smut that was in there pushed the plot along and for a book that's 69 pages, it was very balanced. I agree. I agree. Yeah. Good. Yeah. Well done. Do you have any reviews you want to share? I do. Reviews gets a 3.33. So just like Lion Among Men by Gregory McGuire right there. Same level earlier this year. Yeah. Only 86 reviews though. So hey, no one stars yet that were left written reviews for. So I to pulled a couple two stars. Seriously, flight attendants and your fellow plane occupants will notice. Please do not attempt. Oh, cuz they had a little sexy time on the plane. A little. It was pretty It was pretty out there. Yeah, people would notice. Yeah, for sure. Was not started discreet, turned undiscreet fast. I'm like, okay. Yeah. Uh, but hey, fantasy. What are you gonna do? Two stars. I need to bleach my eyes after reading this. Okay, another two stars. Well, I needed to wash my eyes after reading this. Someone else says, "I actually need holy water to wash my eyes after reading this." Seems to be a theme. I mean, I I feel like we've read way worse. But yeah, same same. I will say though, like um nothing with an origin and pilgrims in the same story. So, that's unique to this for sure. Yeah. You still feel like you're at a solid three stars? I still feel like it's a four stars. No, I stick with my three. Yeah. Uh, five couple I just wrote one five stars down and it was that. Well, I never thought about pilgrims like that before. So, I thought that was funny. Yeah, there's a challenge like this did not accomplish this for me, but could you write a pilgrim book and actually make the pilgrims hot? Like MMC pilgrim hot? Is that possible to do? Yeah, they'd have to be like undercover trying to dismantle the system. But yeah, as soon as you I mean the stockings and the hat. Mhm. Take that off cuz listen the who plays the guy in the Salem witch trials with uh uh that girl. I remember him being top-notch in the Salem. No, sorry. In the Crucibles. Who's the guy in the Crucible? In like the old movie. You thought he was hot. It's not super old. It's like the '9s. Oh, okay. Well, now I'm curious. Um, yeah. With uh what's her name? Cuz what's her name's in it? 1996. Um, let's Oh, yeah. We got to watch this one again. So, we'll just look it up cuz look it even more so now. You're so right, dude. Who is that? You remember? We were watching this in our AP English class and we were like, "Yeah, I don't remember this at all." Yeah. Winona Ryder and Daniel D Lewis. Winona Ryder. Oh, it's Daniel Day. Lewis, duh. That's why. What a dream, dude. So, he is the only exception. And he doesn't wear the hat. But honestly, even with the whole get up, I could just go like this, like cover up the hat and the and then you're fine. What a time to be alive. This is This is what we were watching in high school. We didn't appreciate it or I didn't appreciate it as much as I should have. This is the first hot pilgrim that popped in my mind. Yeah, good for you. I didn't even have that in there. See, he wears like a cowboy hat. They knew better. There are definitely pilgrim looking dudes in these pictures that I'm seeing. So that was a choice that they were like we just can't get the women on board if we put them in the whole thing. Well, hey. So, all right. It's like homework assignment. Go watch the cruise from 1996, right? Thanksgiving vibes in a way. Yeah, totally. Totally. Salem witch trials. Same thing. Same thing. All right. Uh, do you have any quotes that you want to share from Home for the Gobble Days? I was laughing until I realized they were about to sodomize my boyfriend with a rusty 400year-old screw. He was clearly a little into sodomy, which was very exciting to find out. Definitely filling filing that away for later, but I imagined he'd prefer a working uh tush. I'm going to ass. I'm going to center myself with that. Working ass when this was all done with. I do. That was the funniest part of that. You're like, I'm gonna say tush.

Say a line. We're talking about ghost pilgrims and a rusty screw up your boyfriend's butt. But we're going to say tush because we want to make sure that it doesn't offend anyone.

Yeah. If you made it this far, it's your own fault, dude. Yeah, dude. Yeah. Oh, that's hilarious. Uh, okay. So, there you go. I can't do better than that. See, I want more with the uh the other side of it that I was talking about before. What's more American than dining together to celebrate revisionist history with a big family meal where we all have to just pretend things are fine and then suck the dick of capitalism the next day. Boom. Mic drop. Yeah. See, that's why I feel like, you know, the deeper themes are here if you are willing to see them, right? There's that. Yeah. Mhm. Listen, this this author Yeah. Cuz now that you bring it up, she's also like calling out like um Black Friday and not wanting to do that and stuff. I could hang out with this author for sure. I think so. Yeah. Yeah. Do you have any more quotes you want to share? That's it. All right. We'll just leave it there. We'll read it to believe it. Do you have any more things to say about this book or should we move on to Basted?

Basted. Let's go. Basted Let's Go, guys. Well, hang on. Did you think Home for the Gobble Days was going to be what it was? I had no idea, literally at all. No, I would have never guessed that's what it was about. Demonic, they're like in an airplane flashbacks. Demonic ghosts. What's happening? Yeah, it went I mean cuz last year I feel like the Thanksgiving reads not full sack but the other one that we read just ended up about being like about regular dudes and like hooking up with regular dudes anything about there was barely anything about with Thanksgiving. Yeah, I definitely didn't see this coming. I was like, "Oh, is it going to be another one of those?" Like it was not. It delivered for sure. It's up there in the ranking. I can't wait till we do it till we do a ranking of all the cringey unhinged books that we've read. for sure. Yeah. Okay. So, basted. Here we are. This is a sentient object romance by Abby Hunter. This is our first one from her also. So, these were two new authors to us. Um, all right. So, we'll just kick it off with our spoiler-free review and spice rating. Okay. This might surprise you. I rated Based four stars. Wow.

Wow. because it was so it's like your reasoning for full sack is my reasoning for basic. Oh, it was so crazy that I was like four stars. Like I can't give you five stars cuz you didn't change my life, but four stars. Wow. I thought I knew Ye. I thought I knew Ye. I'm like feeling bad for Liz that she's having to read this as a vegan and that as somebody that hates anybody feeding her food, watching others feed each other food, all that empathy I had for you and you do this to me. I know it's it came out of left field. It came out of left field. That's why I didn't say anything more. Um, well, I don't want to explain too much right now before we get into the details, but just have it be known that when a book is that unhinged, like I said, it's going to get a higher rating for me because it was so I've never read anything else like it. It was so out there. And I feel like the overall theme, I'll just say it here, the overall theme of like men ain't [ __ ] was like so funny to me that I was just dying. the whole time just laughing at that. And so, um, I'll just leave it at that before we get into the spoiler section, but that was very satisfying to me. So, four stars and I gave it a five spice. Yeah. Okay. All right. What about you? I'd say Five Spice is solid. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Well, hey, two stars. Um, I was struggling with this. This was my face um the entire time. Yeah, I think that was probably my face, too. Yeah. Yeah. So, uh it it could have been higher stars for me, but I do feel like the plot fizzled out, which is something that really annoys me with these uh style books is if they don't uh they build up hype and then underdel. To me, it underdelled as far as the plot goes. it it took a hard left which is okay if they like do it right. So to me it didn't. So hey I feel like it was so out there that it was like it was like okay this wrap-up is bizarre but this whole thing has been bizarre. So stamp of approval moved on. Okay great. Um this shocked. Color me shocked. I feel like this is only our second Sentient Object Romance that we've read on here though, right? Yeah. Yeah. So, we need to read more cuz like you guys keep asking us about him. So, yeah, we we should probably do that at some point. All right. So, here's the summary. So, we're getting into spoilers now for uh B.

Here's the summary. All right. It's very simple. There's not a whole lot that happens here. So, you have this woman. She is with her current boyfriend. Um she he's a chef. He like owns a restaurant. She goes down to the restaurant dressed as a turkey, which was like red flag 101. Okay. Um dressed as a turkey to like surprise him for like I don't know sexy time on Thanksgiving. Uh she comes in, he's literally doing it with some other chick. I think like the hostess or something. And so she hides. She's like, "I don't even want to confront this." She's so upset. He and the hostess end up like leaving to go like do whatever that night. And she ends up I'm like, "I don't even know how this happens." But basically, she goes into the kitchen and I don't know. I think she was just going to like maybe eat some food or something like that. Like she was like, "H whatever. He has like a bunch of leftovers from like their Thanksgiving dinner thing, so I'm just going to eat some food." and ends up getting like spoken to by like three basers.

Keep going. Okay. It is a sentient object romance. We don't understand how this works. Okay. It's this is again it's fantasy for a reason. So basically there's like there's a turkey baster and there's there's a master baster. Yeah. That's the turkey baster. He's Mhm. He's the master baster. Get it? Get it? Mhm. And then there's a is it a ham and a duck? Maybe there's like two other No, they're just slightly smaller. Slightly smallers. So, different sizes. Yeah, different sizes. And um she essentially ends up like having sex with them all um over the course of the next few hours where they like talk to her and like the more they have sex the more like sentient they become I guess that's how it more like um like phantomy I think a little bit a little bit more corporeal I guess you could say like attached to something just like floating in space fully. Yeah. It like gives them like their body in a way. Yeah. But more like a ghosty body, not like a full Yeah. That's how I envisioned it. Yeah. Unfortunately. Mhm. Yeah. Um so yeah, she has like sex with three basters and then she steals them and they go back to her apartment where she births their baster meat babies. Baster babies. Which what are they? I don't know. I put she has to do something too like she has to eat certain food or something to keep them alive or something weird too or you know she has to put stuff on. I don't know. Yeah. I don't remember either. But basically she ends up having their I just put turkey babies. Yeah. Cuz like really we don't understand what they are and they just live happily ever after in this like relationship with three semi-corporeal baster dudes and their turkey children. Yeah. a happily ever after, if you will. Happily ever after. Um, a good warmhearted story for for Thanksgiving. Enjoy. Read it around the hearth. Um, yeah. I just felt like it was like, what am I reading? This is like an insane fever dream like that you would like wake up from and be like, I am never telling a soul about this. But like someone wrote a whole book about it and I was like, dude, dude. Okay. So, all right. I'm never telling a soul. So funny. Um, so what is something you liked? You have to pick something that you liked. Yeah. No. Um, you know, body positivity, I'll say. Like interesting. recognizing that now the now ex-boyfriend was an absolute jerk, you know, and slowly embracing her body more and more throughout this book by eating so many meats, eating all the things and but even recognizing her own beauty. Yeah. you know, while in the in the act cuz her boyfriend was a jerk and would make her not be who she was. Yeah. Yeah. Try to change her and also was very abusive in that way. Mhm. Yeah. So, yeah, I liked that. Okay. Beautiful. About you? Uh, I put I liked how explicitly basters are better than men.

Like there are so many quotes that I'll share in the quote section where like she's literally just talking about how like these like in all seriousness these three turkey basters are like giving her more than her boyfriend ever did. And that would make me laugh continuously like throughout the entire book. I could not stop laughing at that cuz she kept making comments. So that was for sure my favorite part. Nice cuz I'm like is this the overarching theme? It might be. It might just be. Might be. Um, what was something that you didn't like if you had to choose one thing you hated? Well, good luck this week. Looking at basters, juices, turkeys, anything Thanksgiving food related, the same ever again. Maybe that's why it didn't bother me because I don't eat any of this, so I don't care. I mean, I'm going to forget it by the time it's going. But hey,

I'm not basting my toe. I think technically you're supposed to, but I don't, so it doesn't matter. Yeah. Um, but I actually did hate what brought it down to two stars really cuz it's not it's it's the what it's about, right? So, I can't hate on it too much. Um, and some people love that, right? They love the eating trope and all that. Um, I actually hated that we had to deal with all the buildup of the shitty cheating boyfriend and talks of some like what she wishes for resolution, but then it just kind of like fades and we never talk about it again once the deeds are done, you know? So, that was kind of annoying. That's why I felt like, well, okay, I know we needed something to move the plot along, but I guess I just wanted like a satisfying FU moment to the boyfriend. Oh. Uhhuh. And that's what I was thinking that all that buildup was for. Especially like that was a little odd because they did live together and like we didn't find like so she just like shows up with these three like turkey basters and then turkey babies and like the boyfriend just where did he go? Yeah. I mean we could fill in the blanks but that's not as fun. Although I mean I can imagine he came back to the restaurant and saw the kitchen in such disarray. Truly. Um and like crime scene level and then maybe he would notice the b he would notice the basters are gone because they were special basters, right? They were like mounted. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. For like the special holiday. Yeah. So he's like f Let me look at the CTV cameras. Oh my god. Imagine. Horrifying. Imagine. Okay. Imagine. So that was floating everywhere. Well, that was another thing where I was like, is this just supposed to be kind of like did this lady lose her mind? Like I kind of Right. I was thinking about that, too. Yeah. Like she just, you know, she's with this abusive guy and he's clearly terrible and she's just been like starving herself and just like not doing well for who knows how long. It seemed like she was on the verge already and then she sees that. I mean, she's dressing up like a turkey, okay, for to be sexy, okay, which no shame. If that's like sexy to you, good, good for you. But it seemed like she was already dangling by a thread. Yeah. And then like So I was like, did she just like snap when she saw that? Was like, I'm going to wreck his entire kitchen. And just freaking lost her entire mind and just wrecked his kitchen. Then was like, I'm taking these turkey basters. They're my new boyfriend. Look like if I was watching the CTV footage, I'm like, "Oh my gosh, well, I guess she saw us. I guess she knows." And then just runs off with his stuff. you know, like that kind of could be like the other perspective of this, too. So, that kind of cracked me up, too, cuz I was like, well, a lot could have been happening here. We don't really know. Sure. Yeah. Um, so I put I did not like the body shaming stuff like because that was obviously a big portion of this as well, but it made us explicitly dislike the ex-boyfriend. So, that's great. Yeah. And it gave the character opportunity for character growth. Mhm. M but we're like okay. Um a little extreme, but that's okay. Um and then I put the chicken babies because I don't understand what happened there. And that freaked me out. Yeah. Mhm. Just explain it a little bit better. That was something that I didn't want to know more, but I did want to know more if that makes sense. Like I don't need to know more about the process of making the chicken babies, but like were they human? Were they ghosts? Were they actually chickens? Like what was it? Yeah. Yeah. Like if you're Here's a question for the ages. If you're being impregnated by turkey juice, what does that make? What kind of baby does that make? Riddle me this. Yeah. Phantom. It's phantomy. It's it's uh it's uh it's uh Yeah. Like literally the author knew either. Yeah. Yeah. So, I would have liked a little resolution on that, but at the same time, I didn't necessarily want or need more information. You know what I mean? Like, you're good. It's not going to keep you up at night. I'm good, but I do wonder about that. Yeah. Mhm. Yeah. Okay. Um, how would you say the plot versus smut ratio was? Oh, I I didn't like the smut ratio on this one. Mhm. I needed a couple more answers like you just said too about those things as well. The wrap it felt like a quick wrap-up. Yeah. Maybe because she was trying to stick to 69 pages also as you do. Um, yeah. I feel like for what this was, honestly, I just appreciated it for what it was. That's fair. Yeah. I wasn't expecting more plot out of this cuz she's literally doing it with three inadimate objects, you know, like what's Yeah. And it's like clearly there's a lot of other things going on there. So, um yeah, for that reason I'm like, you know what? I wouldn't change it. I feel like it's good the way it is. Wouldn't change a thing about you. I wouldn't change a thing about you. You're perfect the way you are. That was beautiful. Um okay, so let's see. I did look up a few reviews. All right. Okay. It also doesn't get very many. So, it got a 2.68. There's only 764 ratings. This is on good readads. More reviews, but less rating than the last one. Yeah. Um, so we'll start with one stars and we'll work our way up from there. All right. One star. If I could give negative stars, I would. I have a high tolerance for sentient object romance, but this was actually horrifying. Why was Why was this woman being tag teamed by a trio of sentient baster brothers, one of whom was named Master, who were talking non-stop about impregnating her and her having their baster babies. Yeah. Yeah.

Okay. One star. Curiosity got the best of me with this one. Genuinely from the bottom of my heart, what the f was this? Yeah. Um, okay. Three stars. This one cracked me up. Have you ever walked into Thanksgiving and saw those basers filled with turkey gravy and wished, "Man, these things should have tentacles and gang bang me until they impregnate me with their juices." No. Okay. Well, for anyone who has had this thought, then this is the book for you.

Yeah. Yeah. I was like, well, that sums it up. Okay. And then I have a couple five stars just for fun. Five stars. I have never read anything like this ever. It's the reason why I gave it a four star. Very unique. Yeah. What a way to get into the holidays. If you want to be stuffed for Thanksgiving, this is the book for you. Hear me out, basters. Like the ones you use to base a turkey, but there's so much more. Are you ready to be quote unquote spit roasted like a proper bird? The creativity for this is what earned it five stars. So yeah, I would agree. I would agree. And then one more five stars. I love this. If you know me, you guys know that I will read any shifter book. Last Thanksgiving, I read a few turkey shifters. I have read a gingerbread shifter, a cooked turkey shifter, bird shifters, but never turkey basters. This was fantastic. I could not stop chuckling the entire time just imagining what was happening. The spice was spicy. The writing flowed so beautifully. If you're looking to have a good laugh, read some smut and read some smith, then this book is for you. So, hey. Yeah. Well, it just all depends on something for everyone. Yeah. Yeah. Totally. What a what a time. What an entertaining. Yeah. Yeah. There you go. Well, well, I have a quote from this. Do you have any quotes? I do, unfortunately. All right. I just have one. Okay.

Is it a struggle to say it aloud? Yeah. They weren't just filling the holes in my body, they were filling the holes in my heart.

That's so beautiful. Happy Thanksgiving, everybody. Happy Thanksgiving.

Okay, what do you got? All right, I have a few that all are on the same theme, right? Which is the theme I was talking about earlier. They all have names, by the way. So, one's named Pip as as I hated Pip the most. Least favorite character. We're literally talking about basters. Okay. I whimpered as Pip's words washed over me. Had anyone ever spoken to me like that before. It was as if these basters knew exactly what I've been waiting to hear my whole life. Wow. This is depressing. Great. They were making me realize that everything my ex-boyfriend had done to me was nothing compared to what I had just experienced. That's true. Mhm. With the three of them curled around me, it felt like it was the first time I'd been loved properly for years. Oh, it's And this last one. Oh, I'd never been this responsive, but maybe they were what I needed all along. Basters who knew what they were doing, who would treat me right. Basters who craved me and loved me. Basters who wanted me for me. Beautiful. Mhm. Right here. There's some There's someone out there for everybody. We all have soulmates. Someone or something. Someone or something. Mhm. Um but yeah, I just I thought that was hilarious. She's like, "Screw my boyfriend. And I've got these three inanimate objects. So, hey. Yeah. Do you have any more things to say about Basted or should we move on to our general Thanksgiving book questions? I'm ready for the Jenny's. All right. The generals. All right. Do you understand why Thanksgiving smut is a micro trope? I mean, yeah. This is a fun, silly old time. And it got me in the vibes. Not going to lie. Yeah. I felt the scene was set or worse. Um, pilgrims absolutely not uh cannot ever take seriously. So that's just a fact. Um, but so here's the thing. Basters like in theory, okay, sure, fine, right? It's phallic shaped. Okay, we all can see that with our eyes. But can we just say it is so that sounds so dangerous. The suction don't listen. Okay. I think she puts a disclaimer at the beginning of the book that's like, "Don't actually do this. Don't do any of this, please." And also the raging UTI that homeg girl had to go home with. Dude, it just feels like that burn even in the moment. But hey, they're magic, so it's okay. But like, dude, don't be don't be shooting juices up there, guys. Those kind of juices. So it took that for me took it out a lot cuz the baster thing actually sounds horrifying because like I don't you got your cervix up there. Don't you could hurt some things bad. Yeah, for sure. It seems like on like a Yeah. Uhhuh. At an uncomfortable level. Uncomfortable. So I guess that's what hard it was hard for me. Yeah. I had to like disassociate from that a little bit and just like take from it magic. It's safe. Yeah. Exactly. Like it's great. It's fine. I'm fine. Um, okay. So, you are you a yay or a nay on ghosts? Ghosts. I'm still a nay for ghost. Like, I get it. I get it. You know what I mean? Yeah. It's It's a no for me dog, but I get it in general. Just not the pilgrim ghost. Not pilgrim ghost. Yeah. No on that. Um, what about sentient object romance? and just throw a curveball at you. Do you get it? Do you understand it? Still not yet. More investigation will be required. Yeah, I agree. I haven't yet, I think, met a sentient object that like really I connected with. Yeah. But that's not to say that it can't happen. Yeah. There's plenty of them out there. Yeah. Mhm. So, maybe we'll have to do more investigation. Send us your recommendations if you will. Why not? Yeah. So, will you read another I'm sure we'll read more. Yes. We're going to keep going until they ban us. Yeah. Exactly. Exactly. We're going until the wheels fall off, guys. Yeah. Buckle up. It is what it is. Would you say that these reads were actually Thanksgiving reads? Because we've read some that were themed in the past that didn't really have very strong theming. Yes, I would say definitely basted. Oh, I Yeah, I mean, hello. And Home for the Gobble Days. Yes, even though it was still a little different with the spooky vibes and the ghosties, you know, you get the best of both worlds. A spooky Thanksgiving, you know, but obviously still very Thanksgiving. Yeah. A lot of stuff. I would definitely agree. Like these were very very Thanksgiving themed. Like there's no way around it. Like Yeah. which is what we that's like what I want out of these books first and foremost. If they're claiming to be covering the holidays, like I want to feel like I'm in that time of year, you know, now we've had a couple books that we've read that aren't. They just use it as like an excuse to write it and I'm just like that you could just have it be any day then, you know? So, exactly. I do appreciate that hands down. That like almost gives it another star for doing that, you know? Yeah, they're just very very very themed. I felt like these were very unhinged. This one based in particular checked all the boxes for me. So that's why I gave it a high rating because I was like, "Wow, this delivered the unhingedness like no other." Mhm. Yeah. Well, let's do an unhinged smasher pass. So, I have a Thanksgiving themed one as not a literal smash or pass, just like a would you into this or not? You know, like cool as a vibe for Thanksgiving. I have one from these books that we read. Oh, great. Okay. Well, I'm going to hit you with this. Uh, Black Friday in general, smash or pass. Pass times 10 billion trillion. I come from trillion billion jillion gazillion infinity. Pass. Infinity. Hate. Yeah. Hate. Hate. Black Friday. What does the Grinch say? Loa entirely. Loathe entirely. Hate. Hate. Hate. Hate. Hate. Double hate. Triple hate. Loa entirely. Yeah. Truly. Mhm. Uh, we both came from a long long line of retail. That has a lot to do with it. I worked in the mall for like 10 years and had to do like 10 years of Black Fridays and I would not ever wish that upon anyone. And I it I just don't care. I literally don't care. I don't care. Yeah. Keep me out of all the places. I would rather stay home and relax on any day. I don't even like shopping normally. Like unless it's book shopping, like I don't even like shopping normally. Like why? No. Absolutely not. Yeah. Yeah. For all those reasons. Plus like I absolutely hate that at the end of the day I don't care like the thing what Thanksgiving the holiday it's not that like that's not why I get together with my friends and family. It's that it's an opportunity that most of us are off Yeah. to hang out with our friends and family. So yeah, I hate that capitalism has taken that and over like before co especially more and more stores were opening earlier and earlier which was removing families and friends from spending time together in the guise of buying gifts for those family me go spend time with your family. I think the last like Black Friday I worked like we had to go in at Victoria's Secret at 5:00 a.m. on Thanksgiving day. On Thanksgiving. Yeah. So it's like what are we doing? So luckily co like made that stop kind of. I don't know if we're going to start getting it again, but as we've seen the deals aren't even deals anymore. I have gotten better deals two weeks before Christmas now than any sales before that. Black Friday is like a thing of yester year. And I'm kind of glad unless you were like one of those people that would stand in line to get a, you know, $20 TV. That doesn't even happen anymore. And like that still couldn't be me. I still couldn't be me cuz I'm going to spend time with my family. I hate Black Friday to a passion. I used to do like Cyber Monday, but like I said, the deals aren't even deals anymore. So, who cares? I'm not going to go out of my way. It's like what you said. It's like we're taking everything fun out of the holidays and just allowing capitalism to co-opt it for its own greedy benefits. And I'm over it, too. I'm over it. I'm over it. You'll not catch me doing anything other than watching football and eating food on Thanksgiving. That's it. Literally. Literally. They're like so messed up. I don't like it. Yeah, I know some people do go spend time with their family to do the shopping, you know, like again to each their own, whatever. But me, I don't like it. So, I've had I've been sad when family like leaves to go and do that at 5:00 5 in in the afternoon, you know, like we just finished eating and they got to go. It's like none of that matters. I want to eat pie and watch Christmas movies or whatever, you know? That's all right. So, my smasher pass for you is from our cringey Thanksgiving reads from today. So, you have to pick one. Would you rather be the FMC in Basted or the FMC in Home for the Gobble Days? I'm going to go with um Home for the Gobble Days cuz ain't no way I'm getting basted like that. No. And having those basted babies. I'm good. A turkey. I'm so good. I don't love the pilgrim ghost, but you know what? It worked out for them. So, hey, I mean, honestly, both of these were happily ever after, so it kind of worked out for for everybody. But yeah, I mean, in which case would I rather work out? Yeah. What's the lesser of two evils for me? Yeah. Yeah, I agree. I would definitely agree. Especially because, you know, we averted all pretty much bad issues in Home for the Gobble Days and then it just ended up being like, "Okay, let's be ghost hunters together and everything's fine." So, I would also go with that one cuz it seems like also the FMC and based seems like she might be having a hard time. Yeah. So, there's that, too. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. She seems happy if if not delusional, and that's okay. Yeah. So, it's a fine line, isn't it? It's a fine line. So, do you have any other last words that you'd like to say about these cringy and unhinged Thanksgiving reads before we sign off for the day? No, that's it. You guys, if you didn't get enough, don't worry. Christmas is on its way. Santa's coming, baby. Hey, maybe he is, maybe he will, maybe he won't. We'll see. Um, with that said, yeah, make sure to like, follow, and subscribe. That way you don't miss out on our cringey Christmas. A very merry cringy Christmas episode which will be like the week before Christmas or it's the week of I can't remember but you know have your notifications turned on so you get notified. It's every Tuesday we bring to you new episodes. And don't worry next week I believe is the Wicked wrap-up series. You know we're going to be ranking and talking about the movie. So that's what's going on also because in juxiposition we are deep diving into the political themes of Wicked in that book series. So, you know, it's something for all of you. Yeah. Well, we're wellrounded over here. That's the moral of the story. Do we get whiplash from it? Yeah, sure. But it helps. It helps our brains. Yeah. It's recovery. So, thank you so much for joining us today. I hope you're having a good week out there. And we'll see you next Tuesday and Friday. And Friday. Bye bye.